This was just too good not to share......

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A man walked into a very high-tech bar. As he sat down on a stool he
noticed that the bartender was a robot. The robot clicked to attention
and asked, "Sir, what will you have?"
The man thought a moment then replied, "A martini please."
The robot clicked a couple of times and mixed the best martini the
man had ever had.
The robot then asked, "Sir, what is your IQ?" The man
answered "Oh, about 164."
The robot then proceeded to discuss the 'theory of relativity',
'inter-stellar space travel', 'the latest medical break throughs',
etc.......
The man was most impressed. He left the bar but thought he would try
a different tact. He returned and took a seat. Again the robot clicked
and asked what he would have? "A Martini, please."
Again it was superb! The robot again asked "What is your IQ sir?"
This time the man answered, "Oh about 100". So the robot started
discussing NASCAR racing, the latest basketball scores, and what to
expect the Dodgers to do this week end.

The guy had to try it one more time. So he left, returned and took a
stool.... Again a martini, and the question, "What is your IQ?"
This time the man drawled out " Uh..... bout 50".
The robot clicked then leaned close and very slowly asked,



"A-r-e......... y-o-u-r......... p-e-o-p-l-e.......... g-o-i-n-g...........t-o.......t-r-y......a-n-d........
n-o-m-i-n-a-t-e.......... B-u-s-h.........a-g-a-i-n-?????

lol, good one. Anyone got any blonde jokes, I love them.

Not exactly a blond joke,,,,,, but maybe

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Brokeback Mountain Ranch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife.
She was a very good looking woman, and determined to keep the ranch,
but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad
in the newspaper for a ranch hand.

Two men applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk.
She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied, she
decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him
around the house than the drunk.

He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and
knew a lot about ranching. For weeks, the two of them worked, and the
ranch was doing very well. Then one day, the rancher's widow said to
the hired hand, "You have done a really good job and the ranch looks
great.

You should go into town and kick up your heels."

The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night.
However one o'clock came and he didn't return. Two o'clock and no
hired hand. He returned around two-thirty and upon entering the
room, he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass
of wine waiting for him. She quietly called him over to her.

Unbutton my blouse and take it off," she said.

Trembling, he did as she directed. "Now take off my boots." He did as she asked, ever so slowly.
"Now take off my socks."
He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.
Now take off my skirt."
He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light.

"Now take off my bra."

Again with trembling hands he did as he was told and dropped it to
the floor.

Now," she said, "take off my panties."
By the light of the fire, he slowly pulled them down and off.

Then she looked at him and said, "Now... If you ever wear my clothes into
town again, I'll fire you on the spot

Joke of the Day

A guy sitting at a bar at Heathrow Terminal 3 noticed a really
beautiful woman sitting next to him. He thought to himself: "Wow,
she's so gorgeous she must be an off duty flight attendant. But which
airline does she work for?" Hoping to pick her up, he leaned towards
her and uttered the Delta slogan: "Love to fly and it shows?" She
gave him a blank, confused stare and he immediately thought to himself:
"Damn, she doesn't work for Delta." A moment later, another slogan
popped into his head. He leaned towards her again, "Something special
in the air?" She gave him the same confused look. He mentally kicked
himself, and scratched Singapore Airlines off the list. This time the woman
turned on him, "What the F*** do you want?"
The man smiled, then slumped back in his chair, and said "Ahhhhh, Thai Airways


Grandfather